Today, I would like to tell you a bit about the invisible Monsters you can encounter.
They are called Chronic Conditions or Invisible Illnesses.
This monster likes to hide for the outside and tortures it’s victims where no one can see.
There are variable forms of this monster.
A couple of examples:
- Crohns
- HMS
- Lupus
- Fibromyalgia
- MS
- Anxiety
- Autism
- Bipolar
- And lots and lots more!
This monster even comes out as Depression or PTSD I wrote about earlier. (click the words for those articles)
First of all, let’s see what the specialists can tell us about this monster:
Invisible disabilities are disabilities that are not immediately apparent.
Invisible disabilities are chronic illnesses and conditions that significantly impair normal activities of daily living. In the United States, 96% of people with chronic medical conditions show no outward signs of their illness, and 10% experience symptoms that are considered disabling.
Invisible disabilities, also called “hidden disabilities”, can hinder a person’s efforts to go to school, work, socialize, and more.
Although the disability creates a challenge for the person who has it, the reality of the disability can be difficult for others to recognize or acknowledge. Others may not understand the cause of the problem, if they cannot see evidence of it in a visible way.
Like I said, this monster is torturing it’s victims without the rest of the world even knowing!
Picture this for a moment:
Every day you are fighting a battle no one knows about. You are fighting against the pain, the agony, the exhaustion and the daily wish to just be allowed to give up.
On Top Of That:
You have to battle against people in your surroundings who don’t understand anything about the battle you are fighting every day because they can’t SEE what’s wrong with you! You will even have to fight doctors because some invisible conditions don’t show in their regular tests or they give you the wrong diagnose or medicine.
So besides fighting against a monster who’s there to torture you every day of your life, you also have to deal with people who can’t see this invisible monster. You have to explain yourself over and over again.
That’s a hell of a battle!!!
Well, I can tell you out of own experiences: it sucks.
Battling a monster as vicious and evil as this one is hard enough without having to fight for a bit of understanding as well.
How identify this Monster
Yes, well this can be a bit tricky… it’s invisible after all….
The best way to identify this monster is to just LISTEN to what someone says.
Don’t judge on appearances.
An example, you all know how I look like because I model for my own photos.
But what most of you might not know is that I have three invisible chronic conditions to battle: Crohns, PTSD and HMS.
And yea, that sucks.
How to deal with this Monster
Battling this monster yourself:
If you have to face this monster every day, you probably already know how to battle it. But I know that it’s very hard to fight every day against something that’s never going away.
So, I will share a few tips that help me:
- Be clear to the people around you. Tell them about the monster that you are battling. Explain it. And don’t get upset when they don’t get it right away. It’s hard for people to understand something they can’t see. Be patient.
- Be honest. If you don’t feel well, just say it. You are helping no one by pretending that you are okay.
- Be aware of your limits! Listen to your body. Take your rest but don’t stop doing the things you love if that’s a possibility. You have to have fun in life!
- Don’t give up! I know it’s hard, but you have to keep fighting. Do not let that monster win!
- Find things that make you smile. Enjoy every moment you can enjoy. Make the best out of every situation.
- Don’t whine. Yes, that sounds harsh, I know. But talking yourself down isn’t going to help you. Of course life sometimes sucks and you can be upset about that. But after that, you have to get yourself together and stay strong!
- Talk with people who know what you are going through. It can be a relieve to know that you are not alone!
When a loved one is battling this Monster:
Some tips to help making this fight a bit easier for someone you love:
- Ask how they are doing, even when you already know the answer. Just show that you care! Ask them ‘How are you today’ instead of just asking how they are.
- Support them the way you can. If you know someone has a hard time doing certain things, lent them a hand instead of waiting till they ask if you can help. And don’t make a big deal out of it. Just do it.
- Do Not Judge!!! I can’t say this enough! You don’t know what they are going through so don’t go guessing about it. Just ask!
- Do not patronize your loved one. They know best what they’re feeling.
- Don’t say ‘I know what you must feel’ if you don’t have a clue. You can say: ‘I don’t know what it is you are going through, but I am here for you.’
- Try to encourage your loved one without pushing their limits. Again, listen to them.
- Believe in your loved one!
Most important thing to remember about this Monster: Like Depression, it can attack anyone, so don’t judge, just care!
Lots of Love,
Patty
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Reblogged this on . . . We All Are The Universe..
Try applying for disability if you have these conditions. It’s next to impossible, because we might seem OK 1 or 2 days out of seven. And the rest of the time simple tasks seem insurmountable.
Thank you Ryan.
Yes, that are true words.
It’s very hard to convince people of something they can’t see with their own eyes.
Stay strong!
Lots of love
Patty
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Reblogged this on MadeleineMaya.
Thank you for the reblog!
Lots of love
Patty
Thank you Patty for sharing. Madeleine
Thank you so much Madeleine!
Lots of love
Patty
Reblogged this on Finding Me and commented:
This is also hard. And the stress of the last few months are taken its toll
Hi there Patty, a wonderful post expressed with a depth of knowledge, experience and compassion which will help and comfort people who feel vulnerable and alone with such things.
Thinking of you my dear friend and sending love and hugs, James x
Thank you so much James! 🙂
Sending you love and big hugz! ❤
Patty I hope you don’t mind that I reblogged this. You work is fascinating and I so identified with this post. There’s a blogger that loved it so much and has mentioned it several times. I told him about your blog and he’ll be visiting I’m sure a lot. I love your writing it’s all so wonderful. I wanted you to know I admire your bravery, you never shy away from anything and I think that is wonderful. Oh his name is Q. I’m sure he’ll be around. Have an awesome day.
Also i wanted to mention that I’ve been so busy with work that I haven’t been able to work on awards much less keep up with my blog as much so I posted something about no awards but I didn’t want to offend anyone. One person didn’t like it and I never in anyway want to offend anyone them thinking I’m not appreciative of the awards. I wanted to say something because you have so graciously sent me awards and it matters to me what you think and that you know my reason for posting that. I never felt worthy of any accolades for blogging I blog because my heart was broken and my kid is sick and I needed an outlet. Thank you for always being so kind and thoughtful. Michelle
Hey Michelle!
Of course you are always welcome to reblog anything I write! I am honored.
I met Q, he has been checking out my blog and I will sure check out his as well. It’s always great to meet new friends! 🙂
Of course you don’t offend anyone! Awards take up a lot of time, I know! Lol.
Just know that you are always free to accept or not accept any award that I give you. It’s just a way of showing my appreciation for you because I think your art is beautiful and you are such a lovely person! And I know how blogging can be a great outlet. That’s the reason I started blogging as well.
Lots of love and hugz ❤
Oh good. I didn’t want you to be offended. I know you are such a sweet sweet giver and I love it. You are right I seem to be shorter on time these days. 🙂 I love all you post! 🙂
Thank you Michelle! 🙂
Yes, my days are very busy right now. A lot has come on my path.
Luckily, I will soon have some more free time again. 🙂
Lots of love and hugz to you my dear friend! ❤
Lots of love to you as well. And big hugs. I guess being busy is a blessing, if we were bored I wouldn’t like that either.
Great post! I recently was diagnosed with an anxiety disorder. No surprise since I lived a very difficult life. I believe it is a symptom of PTSD. I kept my secret of emotional abuse for so many years along with caring for my son. No surprise I “over flowed my cup” so to speak.
Thank you!
Yes, anxiety disorder can be a symptom of PTSD.
I am sorry that you have to fight that! Keep your head up and stay strong!
Lots of love
Patty
What an important and well written piece. I am truly sorry for your struggles. (For lack of a more appropriate term). Should you ever need a friendly ear to listen, I am here for you. Stay strong, and always do what’s best for YOU Patty. Keep Inspiring
John
Thanks John!
And it’s alright, I am kinda used to them lol.
Thank you for being there, I really appreciate that!
Lots of love and hugz
You are an inspiration. Keep it up!
Thank you so much!
That’s the most beautiful compliment of all!
Lots of love
Patty
Reblogged this on Chronic Pains Blog and commented:
Another great Post by Patty
Wow..a read well werth it , werth comprehending foir me a lot of the info here ,,I have to Deal with PKD in my life, so is very very relevant for mikey here thank you, read werth reading over again. 🙂 Q
Re-blogabble! 🙂 again thank u, some evry good points i need to keep in mind evry day! Namaste’ 2 u this fine day frum 🙂 Q
Thank you very much!
I am glad that you find it worth reading and I am sorry that you have a monster of your own to battle!
Stay strong!
Lots of love
Patty
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Reblogged this on Mind Chatter and commented:
Patty puts invisible illnesses in a whole new light for us, and for those who know someone who has one of these monsters.
I really enjoyed this post. The words of what could be said to one with an invisible illness is great. I so wish others would say these things to me once in a while. I also deal with others, in our little apartment community, who judge me all the time. They don’t know what is going on with me and I get feedback of gossip which is not nice. It finally settles down when residents who do know me set them straight, or my mum says something to them. I get looks all the time because I look younger than the seniors I am living around and riding the special bus with. Then I don’t always walk with a cane and I am not in a wheelchair…yet, so I get looks like, ‘what the hell is wrong with her?’ I don’t judge them on their talk, looks, and sometimes smells; I see no reason why they should even worry about me. I even find I often just stay out of the way and activities as to not take up what they feel entitled to. I used to feel self conscious about this, now I simply don’t care: I do what I have to and to hell with the rest of them.
I will be re-posting this for all the others who read my blog who deal with this monster as well.
Peace & Love
Thank you my dear friend!
Yes, this monster is a tough one as you know. ❤
Really sucks that some people still don't understand. I know it's hard to understand something if you're not have to live with it yourself, but it seems to me that some are not even trying!
Stay strong my beautiful friend!
Lots of love and hugz
great post Patty, thanks for sharing all this information. We who know,know…
Be well and many blessings
teri
Thank you Teri!
Lots of love
this truly is a wonderful post – so much information. i am so sorry that you felt the need to write it, but thankful because it does need to be written – this information needs to get ‘out there’
Thank you Kim! 🙂
It’s okay, I just felt like writing about this today.
Lots of love and hugz
Now this is really good!! Much appreciation for the read! 🙂
Thank you so much! 🙂
lots of love
Patty
Reblogged this on Tell me about it and commented:
Battling an invisible Monster! So good!
I love this Patty! I have type 1 diabetes, thyroid disease and a rare blood disease. But I look normal. So does my daughter. I know what you mean about the things people say. I love this post. It’s hitting on all points all of them excellent! 🙂 You are awesome! 🙂
Thank you my sweet friend.
I am sorry that you have to battle a invisible monster as well!
Stay strong!
Lots of love and hugz
Excellent blog post, Patty!
Thank you so much Karen!
Lots of love
Patty, Your piece on “Battling an invisible Monster” will serve so many others, those who suffer & those who have a family member of friend suffering. Plus, it must feel good to get all this out there personally, perhaps, in more depth & thoroughly than you have ever done before. What struck me the greatest & I can ID with are: 1) that these “invisible disabilities” prevent the person from participating in the basic activities of life; 2) that others have difficulty seeing it & accepting it; & 3) that the person has to fight the doctors re tests, diagnosis, & meds. And your advice to us all how to just be there for support & 5 ways to encourage a person with the right words are INVALUABLE advice. Thanks, Patty. You are so productive & energetic, you needed to convince the world of your invisible monsters! How’s that for encouragement? Phil
Thank you Phil! 🙂
Your comments always lighten up my day!
As you can see, I took your advise on writing about this, it was a bit hard though. You know that I have a problem with letting people see inside me.
But it can also help others and if that’s the case then I don’t mind that much.
Thank you again for your lovely encouragement!
Lots of love and hugz ❤
I can partially understand as my DaughtersInLaws suffer from Crohn’s, and numerous allergies, but to see their modeling pics, Identical Ginger Twins, you’d never know. But spending a lot of time with them during their pregnancies taught me more than I had known. It’s a daily struggle, but they wanted to be Moms so bad, they made sacrifices and still do. I am amazed at the strength of you women and how you do so much, often without any drama, just suffering and continually going forward. I’ve known Marines that weren’t as tough as you women. Thanks for sharing all this info for the uninformed and ignorant. Maybe it will help others to show compassion and respect and understanding. So right, you can’t judge anyone soley from outward appearances, you must know the life others live through their days, hours, minutes, and sometimes seconds. TY Patty
Thank you so much for your kind and encouraging words my dear friend. They mean the world and make me feel strong.
Both your daughters in law have Crohns? I am so sorry. It’s a tough battle for sure!
And thank you for the reblog again, the more people know, the better!
Lots of love and hugz ❤
Reblogged this on georgeforfun.
Well said Patty. Great post. x
Thanks Jade! 🙂
Hugz ❤
Reblogged this on It Is What It Is and commented:
So well said ….. dear Patty!! Happens all the time … not right!!!
Thank you for the reblog my dear friend! 🙂
Lots of love and hugz
Anytime … sweet friend. Need to talk later … spoke with Shauny.
Have to go now. Physical therapy …. hugs!! 🙂
Okay, just send me a message.
Hugz ❤
Will do!!!! ❤ … later!
Top Notch Patty..I stole a picture and it’s getting printed out and sent to my ENTIRE Family…
Thanks pal.
I hope it will help a bit.
Lots of love and hugz! ❤ X
Thank you for bringing up this important post Patty. We are many, who suffer with one or more of those invisible illnesses.
I found out, that personal development is the best, I can do to go on and find my path in this life.
Many places in our world it is still not anything to talk about, so you need to hide your battles, caused peoples minding.
Irene
Thank you Irene.
Yes, it’s very strange that some people still can’t understand this.
And you are right, personal development is very important, I am learning that as well!
Lots of love and hugz
Extremely well said, Patty. Belief from others can be as hard to attain as health.
Thank you Richard.
Yes, I am lucky to be surrounded with people who believe in me, but I often encounter others who still struggle at a daily basis.
Lots of love
You’re welcome, Patty. I’ve had bad spells and know the feeling.
Thank you Patty. I myself came down with a chronic fatigue a few decades ago. By now it is “managed” and often I forget that it is still in me. Its good to share with others especially in the beginning – many of the disorders that are mentioned in your post are the focus of support groups that meet in our local communities and on the Internet.
Second, for me, faith is an area of development that was greatly helpful for me. I still attend meetings and blog about it. One may attend church; but there are hidden supports both there and in the community and on the Internet where amazing inner healing knowledge is readily available to just about anyone.
We ought never surrender to what prohibits our spiritual growth.
Blessings.
~ Eric
Thank you Eric!
Yes, communication is very important. It can make a great difference while battling a monster like this.
I have the ability to ‘forget’ about my conditions as well sometimes. Until they hit me in the face again lol.
But I think it’s best to just do the things you want and deal with the consequences later. Works for me at least.
Lots of love
Patty
Excellent post!
Thank you so much!
Lots of love
Fantastic Post, Patty !! So many people suffer invisibly (and visibly because they are in some manner discriminated against because of their invisibility) Powerful post!
Thank you so much Morgan! 🙂
It’s hard for some people to understand something they can’t see with their own eyes.
Lots of love and hugz
It is indeed…that is true of so much that is unseen!
Blessings~