It has been a while since I wrote a little rant, so I thought it would be time to do that again.
After all, we will always have something to rant about, don’t we?
Let’s talk about ‘quotes’.
I love quotes. I like reading them, sharing them and writing them.
But every once in a while I come across some quotes that annoy the hell out of me!
Here are a couple of them:
This is probably my least favorite quote in the world!
I mean, really??? So, someone you claim to love is being loved and in your little I-haven’t-been-to-any-serious-shit-yet opinion THAT is the worst feeling even?
Try losing your loved ones because they die for change. Then you will know real pain! Or getting abused by the very people who should nurture and protect you. Now, that are some heavy feelings. Way worse than this, trust me!
You need a man… No. Just no. You don’t need someone to complete you and you don’t need someone to care for you.
You need to make your own life worth it and THEN you connect to someone who makes it even more beautiful and you build a future TOGETHER!
Sigh. Newsflash, you can’t just ‘stop caring’. That’s about the dumbest statement ever. If you can stop caring just like that, you never cared in the first place.
Now what the heck is this? Gay pride offends you so you come up with this crap? Listen, you stone aged idiot, it’s 2015!!! Grow up, get a life and stop worrying about someone else’s!
Well, they won’t if they paid attention at school. Maybe they will say ‘You’re cute’ if they think you are and they don’t mind you screwing up the easiest words…
Anyways, quotes are cool. They can explain what you feel when you can’t find the words. Just think a little before you write or share one, because they can also make you look pretty stupid.
Lots of Love,
I am a difficult person to be friends with.
Now, I see some people who read this raise their eyebrows, so let me explain why.
By nature, I’m a kind person. But I am not a friendly person. I keep people on a distance most of the time. Of course, we can hang out and stuff, but I won’t let you come close easy.
And if I let my guard down and let you come close, I will start to love you. And that’s when the trouble starts…
I have a loyalty problem, meaning that I have way too much of it. Once I love you, it mostly is for life. I can’t help that, it’s in my character. But I do expect loyalty in return as well. If you really are my friend, you are my friend to the end. If not, you can just as well pack your bags and leave now.
I also have a temper. If you fuck up, do something stupid, don’t treat yourself well or if I am just mad at you for something, I will tell you! And trust me, I have a big mouth and I can be a real pain in the ass. Or I will stay silent and let you figure out why.
But, if you are my friend, I can fight with you without loving you any less.
Next, I am brutally honest. I don’t lie because, well, I am just not good at it lol. This can come across as blunt or even rude. If you expect sugarcoating, you’re at the wrong bakery.
I am a curious person too. If I like you, I want to know you. So be prepared for a lot of questions! Not because I need to know everything, but just because I like to understand where you are coming from. Makes things a lot easier.
If you need me, I am there for you. No matter what. But, if I need someone, I almost never ask for help. Very annoying, I know. And if I do need someone, I will not be clear about it either.
I am always ‘fine’. You will have to figure it out on your own.
I am stubborn as hell and I do crazy things. If you, as my friend, try to keep me from doing something stupid, it could turn in quite a battle. I will protect you, but I never see it when I need protection myself.
Also, I have PTSD. This comes with a lot of baggage. One of that is that I don’t believe that you will stay. People leave. It’s that simple. Usually, it takes me ages before I will trust you.
PTSD also comes with sudden mood swings, depression, flashbacks or even panic attacks caused by triggers. My mind just works different. I will try to keep you out of that, but I don’t always have it under control. Sooner or later, you will discover the crazy side of me. It makes me a hard person to deal with.
I don’t respond well to compliments either. Not because I don’t like them, I just don’t know how to respond to them.
So you see, I am a difficult friend. But it’s a matter of choice really. I know my flaws. If you can deal with my craziness, don’t give up easy and are willing to stay, I am also a very good one…
Lots of love
Like with every mental problem or disorder, there are a lot of fables and myths about PTSD. That’s not that strange, people can’t see it or they don’t understand it, but it can be very frustrating to those of us who suffer from it.
So, let’s set some things straight today! 🙂
Only veterans can get PTSD.
Nope. Anyone who suffers from a traumatic experience can get PTSD.
(Sexual) abuse, the sudden death of a loved one, domestic violence, serious injury, witnessing or going through a terrifying event and more are all causes for PTSD.
Everyone who experiences a life-threatening event will develop PTSD.
Although it’s true that a lot of people have symptoms of PTSD after a life-threatening event, they can reduce after a couple of months. But, only when you still have the symptoms of PTSD 10 months after the event, you might develop PTSD. There is a difference between ASD (Acute Stress Disorder) and PTSD (Post Traumatic Stress Disorder).
After a certain amount of time, I should be over my trauma.
No. There is no time-table for healing from a trauma.
Sometimes a person can be just fine for some time, but then something triggers the memories and they find themselves plagued by symptoms. Also, some people keep the memories of the trauma hidden away in their mind to protect themselves. But at a certain point, they start to surface and they may find themselves overwhelmed by things that didn’t bother them for decades.
My trauma was so long ago that it’s too late to do anything about it.
The good news is that it’s never too late to address your trauma. In fact, there are a lot of reasons that someone would wait to get treatment. In some ways it is easier treating people with a trauma that’s older than individuals whose event was less than a year ago.
PTSD is only seen in people with ‘weak characters’ who are unable to cope with difficult situations in the same way that most of us do. You should just ‘get over it’.
Are you freaking kidding me? If you are fighting PTSD you are a warrior! You are stronger than whatever it was that hurt you so much. Don’t ever think that you are weak! And for the ones who seriously believe this crap, I invite you to live one day, just one day, with my mind and see if you can survive!
If you have PTSD, you are crazy.
PTSD is a normal response on an abnormal experience. You are not crazy, you are wounded.
Untreated, PTSD does not get better in time. It often gets worse.
PTSD doesn’t just go away. In fact, on many occasions, the flashbacks and nightmares get more severe as you remember more and more about the traumatic event you have been through. There is no shame in getting help. If you would break your leg, you would go to a doctor too.
PTSD can be triggered in a moment by a memory, an image, a sound, or even smell.
Everything that remembers you of the experience you have been through can be a trigger. This trigger can cause a flashback, a fall-out or even a panic attack. Get to know your triggers and, if it’s possible, teach the people who are close to you what your triggers are. It will save you a lot of stress and anxiety.
PTSD can often lead to alcohol and drug abuse.
To numb, to forget, to try to cope with your PTSD, alcohol or drugs may seem like a good and easy option. They are not. It’s not dealing with the problem and it won’t take the PTSD away. If anything, it will make things worse. You will need more and more of the substance you are abusing to keep the PTSD under control. Besides your PTSD, you may now have to fight an addiction as well. Double trouble.
Trauma survivors who have PTSD may have trouble with their family relationships or friendships.
Their symptoms can cause problems with trust, closeness and communication, which may affect the way the survivor acts with others. In turn, the way a loved one responds to him or her affects the trauma survivor. A circular pattern may develop that could harm relationships. People with PTSD often withdraw from social life. Don’t let them go, be there for them and check up on them.
People with PTSD have a high risk of committing suicide.
The flashbacks, nightmares and panic attacks as well as the social isolation can get so severe that someone doesn’t see another way out anymore. Also, depression is a common symptom of PTSD. Reach out and care! It may save someone’s life.
You can heal from PTSD.
The things that happened to you will not magically disappear. They will leave scars, like every other wound. But, you can learn how to deal with your PTSD and live a good life. This will take time and courage. Just don’t give up and keep fighting. Common treatments for PTSD are: Exposure therapy, EMDR therapy, support groups and cognitive behavior therapy.
PTSD needs understanding, not judgment.
Don’t judge yourself for having PTSD. It’s not about what’s wrong with you, it’s about what happened to you. It’s NOT your fault. It’s okay to break down, you don’t have to be strong all the time. Just remember to always get back up and continue to fight. You are worth it.
Lots of Love,