Question….When do you let go?
Imagine this, you have a friend who is like a sibling to you.
You feel this person in your heart, your soul and even in your veins.
You’ve been through hell together, laughed together, fought together and shared everything together.
This person knows you like almost no one knows you.
Your dreams, your nightmares, your past and your crazy mind.
You love this person so very much and you can’t imagine your life without this very special friend.
But then, all of a sudden, this person stops talking to you.
At first, you are not alarmed.
It happened before.
You know this person has issues with depression and anxiety. This person has a history of pushing people away.
Besides, you promised to hold on no matter what.
If you really love someone, you hold on no mater what right?
At least, that’s how I feel.
I don’t make friends for just a short time. I can’t.
That’s just not me.
But the days become weeks and the weeks become months. You send messages, emails, cards. No answer…
You miss this person like crazy and you start to doubt.
Before, you talked to each other every day, but now… nothing.
Because of my PTSD I am very afraid of losing people, so it could easily be just me.
But… what if it’s not?
There never has been a fight, the last message you got was ‘I love you and I will talk to you soon.’
So what the hell happened?
You don’t have a clue.
Because of a relative of this person, you know your friend is okay. So that’s a relief. But…
This awful silence…
So what do you do?
You have tried everything to get in touch.
When do you give up?
When do you decide to let go of the person you promised to hold on to forever and no matter what?
I don’t know, I have never been good in letting go…